Writer's Grove

I’m pretty honkin’ excited about Tuesday, because that’s when everyone can get HAMMERED! I’ll be in NYC with my editors and agent and even my mom celebrating the release of the Iron Druid’s third adventure, where he trades in Arizona for Asgard. Would you like to take a sneak peek for the holiday weekend? The first four chapters has Odin, the Norns, the Valkyries, Imaginary Spock, and more! Here you go, provided I embedded the sucker correctly:

[scribd id=58992141 key=key-2e319kdhajlh1fdaj4xk mode=list]

Hope you enjoy! Peace, love, and sausage!

I have, on occasion, been accused of immaturity. On every such occasion, I have been guilty—except for that one episode with the can of beer and a rubber chicken. That was an experiment.

My chronic immaturity is why I’m proud to be a member of The League of Reluctant Adults, a group of urban fantasy and paranormal romance authors with similar issues. They also happen to write really good books.

Jeanne Stein, for example, just got herself on the NYT Bestseller list with her contribution to Hexed, an anthology of kickass urban fantasy that came out on the same day as my book of the same name. Jeanne also writes a spiffy vampire series called The Anna Strong Chronicles. I’m gonna paste in the Publisher’s Weekly review of The Becoming, her first book, because they nailed it at the end when they spoke of her career:

Anna Strong can’t face herself in the mirror—not because she left her teaching career to become a bounty hunter or because she’s torn between her boyfriend and a new suitor, but because she’s been turned into a reflection-deficient vampire. After being savagely attacked by one of her marks, Anna is left for dead—only to become, surprise surprise, undead. Helping her come to terms with her new, nocturnal lifestyle is an attractive doctor and vampire by the name of Grant Avery. Anna’s new assignment is to find and destroy the rogue vamp that turned her and who is leaving a path of violent destruction in his wake. With plot twists, engaging characters and smart writing, this first installment in a new supernatural series has all the marks of a hit. Anna Strong lives up to her name: equally tenacious and vulnerable, she’s a heroine with the charm, savvy and intelligence that fans of Laurell K. Hamilton and Kim Harrison will be happy to root for. As Anna tries to temper her new bloodlust with her lingering humanity, the trauma of her “becoming” is as compelling as the action-packed story line. If this debut novel is any indication, Stein has a fine career ahead of her.

Coming out July 5, K.A. Stewart’s second Jesse James Dawson novel, A Shot in the Dark, is sure to rock your socks. (Or, if you prefer the letter W, it will rawk your sawks.) High five for the badass leather jacket! I need to get me one of those with a handy inside pocket for a flask.

Here’s the scoop on her book: Jesse James Dawson is a Champion, putting his life on the line for those foolish enough to bargain with demons and fighting to save their souls. But even a Champion needs some downtime, so Jesse takes his annual camping trip to Colorado for some male bonding over friendly games of paintball.

Unfortunately, the fun and war games are interrupted by a pack of creatures summoned up from the very depths of hell by an entity Jesse prayed he’d never see again. With the lives of his friends and a teenager’s soul on the line, Jesse’s only hope may lie with an even more dangerous enemy–his personal demon, Axel…

Also coming up on July 5, My Life as a White Trash Zombie by Diana Rowland! Can I just say how much I love this cover for a minute?

This is by Dan Dos Santos, same guy who does the Patricia Briggs covers for her Mercy Thompson series. He won a Silver Medal at the Spectrum Awards for it. And there’s a spiffy blog post where he walks you through the process of creating it. I want a big freakin’ poster of this cover. Or maybe just the tattoo on her shoulder. “I LOVE BRAINS.” That’s an instant classic.

And you know what? The pages inside are filled with awesomeness! Here’s the blurb: Teenage delinquent Angel Crawford lives with her redneck father in the swamps of southern Louisiana. She’s a high school dropout, addicted to drugs and alcohol, and has a police record a mile long. But when she’s made into a zombie after a car crash, her addictions disappear, except for her all-consuming need to stay “alive”…

BRAAAAAAAINS. Cannot. Wait.

Two of my favorite series from a couple o’ my favorite peeps continue this summer! Right after the holy nerd holiday of San Diego Comic Con, we get treated to books by Nicole Peeler and Kelly Meding!

Eye of the Tempest is Nicole’s fourth book (coming out July 26) and Jane True is one of my favorite heroines. Nicole is an auto-buy for me and her books always make me laugh out loud. Of course, Nicole herself makes me laugh too. Right now she’s in Pennsylvania and jonesing for some decent Mexican food because you can’t get any where she’s at. Please tweet pictures of yummy Mexican food and margaritas to @NicolePeeler because it’s fun to torture your friends (and random authors you don’t really know). Don’t worry, she won’t get mad at you. She’ll get mad at me and send a ninja poodle to hump my leg. Here’s the skinny on Jane True’s fourth adventure: Nothing says “home” like being attacked by humans with very large guns, as Jane and Anyan discover when they arrive in Rockabill. These are professionals, brought into kill, and they bring Anyan down before either Jane or the barghest can react. Seeing Anyan fall awakens a terrible power within Jane, and she nearly destroys herself taking out their attackers.

Jane wakes, weeks later, to discover that she’s not the only thing that’s been stirring. Something underneath Rockabill is coming to life: something ancient, something powerful, and something that just might destroy the world.

Jane and her friends must act, striking out on a quest that only Jane can finish. For whatever lurks beneath the Old Sow must be stopped…and Jane’s just the halfling for the job.

I’ve been gnawing at a strip of rawhide marinated in whiskey waiting for Kelly Meding’s third Evy Stone story, Another Kind of Dead, and it’s not just because the cover model has fabulously feathered hair the likes of which haven’t been seen on this planet since 1985. It’s not just because she can apparently call down green fucking lightning to take out those pesky trains. It’s because Kelly’s Dreg City is a fascinating world and I can’t wait to see what happens there next! Like, you know, MAD SCIENTISTS! It comes out Aug. 2. Here’s the blurb:

Been there. Done that. Evy Stone is a former Dreg Bounty Hunter who died and came back to life with some extraordinary powers. Now all but five people in the world think she is dead again, this time for good—immolated in a factory fire set specifically for her. Evy and Wyatt, her partner/lover/friend, can no longer trust their former allies, or even the highest echelons of the Triads—the army of fighters holding back from an unsuspecting public a tide of quarreling, otherworldly creatures—they can trust only each other. Because when the Triads raided a macabre, monster-filled lab of science experiments and hauled away the remnants, they failed to capture their creator: a brilliant, vampire-obsessed scientist with a wealth of powerful, anti-Dreg weaponry to trade for what he desires most of all—Evy Stone: alive and well, and the key to his ultimate experiment in mad science.

Coming soon to a digital outlet near you, some stuff to get your motor runnin’: Wild & Steamy, a self-published collection of spin-off novellas from three fabulous novelists, including the League’s own Carolyn Crane. Her Disillusionist series has been optioned for a TV series, and this collection includes a story from that world! Exact date for release of this is still a bit unclear, but it’s supposed to be late June/early July, so keep checking Carolyn’s site for updates!

Heck, keep checking here for updates…I might have forgotten something and will shortly have my short n’ curlies yanked out by the League’s enforcer, Mario Acevedo. He carries a tiny pocket shiv with him wherever he goes but disguises his menace with friendly Hawaiian shirts. Don’t fall for it, friends! Mario is fully weaponized!

Coming soon: pictures of pretty things. Questions about egg sacs. And doggies.

‘Tis time to visit the in-laws, and they live in upstate New York. My tree, my house, and my doggies will be left in capable hands while I schmooze lots of trees and much bigger doggies at someone else’s house. And I ain’t kiddin’ about the bigger doggies. They have a Newfoundland and he’s a slobberbucket.

While I’m in New York, I’ve arranged a couple of book-related appearances. The first one will be at Ole Sal’s Cafe and Creamery in Little Falls, NY, on Saturday, June 25, from 3-5 pm. There will be some books for sale there—Hounded and Hexed— but you’re welcome to bring your own too and hang out! The ice cream is nomnomnom and they make great coffee too. Old wood floor in the building, makes you feel important when you walk on it because it makes such great sound. If you’re from anywhere around there and you feel like a nice weekend drive, hope you’ll make the trip, maybe take a ride down the Erie Canal.

The second appearance will be in New York, NY on July 5, the release day for HAMMERED! I’ll be at Posman Books in Grand Central Terminal at 6 pm. If you can’t make it there or send a minion at that time, then please contact Posman and special order ahead of time and I’ll sign your book for you to pick up later!

OK, can I just geek out for a second about HAMMERED?

It has a MAP in it and I MADE IT!! I still can’t believe they let me do it all by myself. And it’s a MAP OF ASGARD! They had to print it pretty darn tiny to make it fit on a paperback page so some of the architectural details of Valhalla, etc. are a bit indistinct, but it still looks turbo cool! I will post a larger version of the map here a few weeks after the release so you can make fun of it. :)

The other thing I’m geeking out about are the chapters narrated by other characters, who all share a decided dislike for Thor. They get told sorta like The Canterbury Tales, and there are FIVE of them. You’ll finally get to learn why Leif Helgarson holds such a grudge against Thor, and that, as you might expect, is called The Vampire’s Tale. After each tale there’s a cool little Celtic doggie thingie that’s called a “dingbat” in typography, which signals that we’re switching from the guest narrator back to Atticus. I love the doggies!

BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE! If you happen to buy the eBook version of HAMMERED—doesn’t matter which device you’re using—then you’ll get a bonus short story called “A Test of Mettle.” It’s told from Granuaile’s point of view, and it lets you know what she and Oberon are up to while Atticus is off doing his thing in Asgard. OK, geek out finished. :)

Comin’ up on the blog, a look at all the amazin’ stuff The League of Reluctant Adults is cookin’ up, instructions on how to make an Atticus omelet, and Documented Shenanigans with my editors in New York! Peace out!

Huge, turbo thanks to everyone who entered! You guys crack me up! Picking winners was extremely tough, but I think I have ’em figured out. These winners will get a signed copy of HAMMERED once they email me their addresses using kevin at kevinhearne dot com:

OK, I also promised two random winners, and these people will get signed copies of HEXED. @Will_Knight3 from the UK wins, as does Chris (Hardcore Pooka) for his entry. Send me your email address, guys!

If you’d like to see the rest of the entries, they’re in an album on my Facebook author page! Thank you all again, you’re the best bunch o’ readers ever!

If you don’t particularly enjoy spicy food, you may be unaware that there are vast swaths of people out there with fierce brand loyalty to their hot sauce. The partisanship can be as fierce as that between Republican and Democrat, Ford and Chevy, or even Yankees and Red Sox. I am not such a one. I rather subscribe to the ancient tautology, “Tasty shit is tasty shit,” which I think was first uttered by Geoffrey Chaucer, but spelled like “Taestye shyte is taestye shyte.”

So. Normally I’m a Tabasco kind of guy. I’ve tried Cholula and Arizona hot sauce, which are popular out here, but they just don’t do it for me the way Tabasco does. When I mentioned on Twitter that I used Tabasco on my eggs (because everybody CARES, I’m sure), one of my peeps in Louisiana, Kayla, suggested that I should try Louisiana Hot Sauce. I had never tried it or even seen it, so she kindly sent me some, and I promised to have a taste test on my blog. Here it is.

First, here’s a picture of breakfast before the hot sauce has been applied. I am showing this to make you jealous that I don’t cook for you.

I was a bad boy and drank most of my coffee before I snapped the picture, but I wanted to be fully awake before the taste test. This will prevent me from having a career in menu photography, alas! OK, so here’s the photo with the omelet halved and the hot sauce applied:

You will notice that the bottom half of the omelet looks mildly irritated while the top half looks afflicted by an angry pox of some kind. The Louisiana Hot Sauce is thicker and redder, no doubt. But will this rich consistency translate to a richer taste?

A side note: There are two ways to pronounce Louisiana. There’s the five-syllable way, which is “loo EE zee ANN uh,” and then there’s the four-syllable way, which is “LOO zee ANN uh.” I prefer the four-syllable pronunciation, because that’s the way Clarence “Gatemouth” Brown said it, and he was a badass who had his mojo workin’. Plus, I want there to be voodoo. Four-syllable Loozyanna has all kinds of voodoo going on. Five-syllable Louisiana is too prissy for things like voodoo.

I tried the Loozyanna Hot Sauce first, because I already know what Tabasco is like. Here is what I discovered: it’s not as hot as Tabasco. Its flavor is subtler, too, so you might need to pour a bit more on and make the angry pox rage like Zack de la Rocha does against the machine. It’s good!! I’m definitely going to experiment with it more, and I’m glad Kayla sent me some. Thanks, Kayla! Methinks I still prefer Tabasco, however, both in heat and taste. It gets my mojo workin’. Listen to Gatemouth tell you about it:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FxUEMRqZ7uw[/youtube]

Del Rey has signed me up for books 4-6 of The Iron Druid Chronicles, and I have YOU to thank for it! Thank you all so much for buying Hounded! If you hadn’t done so, then quite frankly, the series wouldn’t have continued. Much as a publisher may like a series or an author, they simply don’t make their decisions based on anything except sales, and since you not only bought Hounded but pre-ordered Hexed and Hammered, the business decision wasn’t hard for them to make. I am very grateful to you, because now I get to write more Atticus n’ Oberon! I assure you that  it’s as much fun for me to write as it is for you to read!

The books will be called Tricked, Trapped, and Hunted, and I have outlined all three. Tricked is halfway complete; you can see my progress bar over to the right-hand side of the blog.

As you might expect, I won’t be able to deliver these to you in the next three months. The release schedule for these books will be a bit more like what you’re used to. I can give you extremely tentative release dates now, with the caveat that poo happens and the guarantee that I will keep you informed when I know something more concrete.

Right now we are looking at a May ’12 release for Tricked, a December ’12 release for Trapped, and a summerish ’13 release date for Hunted.

In terms of the entire series, the answer to your question is yes, I do intend to write more after Hunted, and I know how the series will end. But whether I get to finish it or not depends (again) on sales. There are plenty of promising series out there that never get finished, and rare is the case where the author was unable or unwilling to finish it; nearly every time, it’s because the bottom line wasn’t attractive enough on the business side. So again, I’m extremely grateful to you for embracing Atticus n’ Oberon. My flagon is raised in your honor, and if Oberon were here, he’d share his sausage with you! Cheers, friends!

Woooooooo! Final day was a doozy! We got up at sunrise and headed north, singing “Get Out of Denver” by Bob Seger. I’ve always found that song amusing because of the “Baptist preachin’ southern funky school teacher.” Drove all the way up to Laramie, Wyoming, because mi madre wanted to do some research at the American Heritage Center located at the University of Wyoming. We left her there and drove over to the Hastings store, where they had a few copies of my books in stock and I signed ’em. I chatted with the nice folks there and blogged about the prior night’s shenanigans in Denver; now I’m in the Denver Airport bloggin’ about the shenanigans in Ft. Collins.

We found a place to park and walked back to where the signing was to be held, and ran across THIS sign:

So we had to go in and chat! Turns out this is a different branch o’ the family that split off looong ago, all the Hearnes in America being descended from three brothers. My branch migrated south and then west, her branch migrated west directly from Maryland and kinda spread out from there. So we’re cousins 25 times removed or something. It did my heart glad to know that the business is a green one. :)

So! Old Firehouse Books. AWESOME STORE. Used to be a firehouse in the 19th century and they still have the little pole to slide down to prove it. Here’s what it looks like—it’s on Walnut Street across from Hearne’s:

And look what they did for me!!! I hereby dub this the coolest sandwich board thingie ever!

OK, so, a little bit about this place. First, the Sci-Fi/Fantasy shelf is A HUUUGE TRACT OF LAND and it’s in the front of the store WHERE IT BELONGS! The staff knows the genre well and they are now my Special Nerd Friends. Shall I show you a shiny picture?

I should probably warn people to wear sunglasses if they’re going to see me in person, because I’ve learned on this trip that my head is a highly reflective surface. Standing to my left in the red shirt is Jacqie, the manager, and she has a shiny triskele pendant from Ireland (as in she bought it in Ireland)! To Jacqie’s left is Tara, the graphics guru for the store, and she has a CRYSTAL D10 DIE around her neck! Are these my people or what! Not only are Jacqie and Tara turbocool, but I have to give shout-outs to Revati and Beth who were also every bit as delightful. I got to meet lots of spiffy people and chat with them a bit, like Chelsea and Jim (who got my wife to sign my books as well), and Josh was wearing a shirt I just had to give him props for:

After the signing, we repaired to Coopersmith’s Brewery. You might have thought I’d be doing New Belgium or Odell’s, but both of those distribute their beers in Arizona and I’ve already tried them. I wanted something new, and besides, it was just a short walk from the store. I sampled five beers:

I’ve forgotten the fancy names for the first two beers; on the left we have a really drinkable unfiltered wheat beer that I ordered a flagon of. The kolsch was very good but I think I’m partial to the Sunbru Kolsch at Four Peaks Brewery back in Tempe. Now, the Poudre. Let me tell you about the Poudre (pronounced POO der). It’s really, really fun to say. The Poudre River runs through Ft. Collins. There are signs throughout the town that say, “Save the Poudre,” and it’s really hard to argue with a sentiment that sounds so much fun. Buuuuut I didn’t like this particular brew very much. One sip and I was done. The Bitter wasn’t bitter at all, it was actually amazingly tasty, and I almost ordered a flagon of that, but a coin toss gave the win to the wheat beer. The Horsetooth was also very good, sweet and shudder-free. After the disappointment of having all my beer STOLEN by Mario in Denver (see previous post), this was quite refreshing.

Even more refreshing than the beer, however, was the company. Tara, Jacqie, Revati and Stina joined us from the bookstore, and together we flashed our Nerd Cred at each other. Tara, for example, was a poetry major, and she recited “I Sing the Body Electric” and gained much admiration thereby and a few worried glances. She is also developing her own roleplaying game system—hence the D10 necklace. You never know when you’re going to need one when you’re a game developer. She is awesome.

Stina turned out to be a type nerd! She can tell you the difference between a widow and an orphan in typography (can you do that without looking it up?), and together we determined that people who abuse Comic Sans and Papyrus might be tearing a hole in the fabric of space-time. Here are a couple o’ my new friends at Coopersmiths:

‘Twas a glorious tour through Colorado. I think I’ll do this again next year, coming back to see the swell people at the bookstores but trying out different breweries. It’s not like Colorado is going to run out of them. When I go back to Denver, I will hire a ninja to guard my beer from Mario.

Roundup o’ news really quick before I board my plane: I’m giving away five signed author copies of HAMMERED to those who enter The Drop Your Sword Contest; you have until Wednesday! Orbit UK has now acquired The Iron Druid Chronicles, and I have a big announcement coming on Monday!

I want to thank all the lovely people in Colorado (and the few I saw in Wyoming) for being such lovely human beings. It was my pleasure to meet you!

Hi, everybody! Here’s a press release from Anne Clarke, my new spiffy editor in the UK!

Press release – Orbit acquires IRON DRUID trilogy by Kevin Hearne

Little Brown’s SF and Fantasy imprint Orbit has acquired an imaginative, witty and action-packed new urban fantasy trilogy which is currently storming the bookstores in the US. Orbit UK Editorial Director Anne Clarke has acquired UK and Commonwealth rights in the first three books in Kevin Hearne’s Iron Druid series from Evan Goldfield at Jill Grinberg Literary Management.

The trilogy, set in Tempe, Arizona, introduces us to Atticus O’Sullivan, rare book salesman, herb peddler, and 2,000 year old druid – the last of his kind – who has been on the run for over two millennia from a very angry ancient Celtic god. The books are set in the modern day world, where gods, myths, and magic are very much alive.  The first book, HOUNDED, primarily features the many Celtic gods; HEXED will focus on Coyote and the Bacchants; HAMMERED will be about a plot against Thor. (Everybody hates Thor.)

Kevin Hearne says: “I’m thrilled to be with Orbit UK and hope people will enjoy this blend of history and legend dropped into the modern world. The rich mythology of the Irish is endlessly fascinating to me, and an allusion to British lore in Hounded will eventually become important later in the series as Atticus finds himself in trouble near Windsor Castle.”

Anne Clarke says: “I first read the manuscript for HOUNDED in 2009 but it was before I moved to Orbit, and although I loved the story, I couldn’t see a way to make it work on my list back then (I was mainly publishing crime thrillers). When I heard the Iron Druid was still looking for a UK home I couldn’t believe my luck, and I’m delighted to be bringing Atticus to the UK after all. And since we’re publishing these books this September, October and November, I don’t have long to wait to share them with everyone else here too. You’re in for a treat!”

…Be assured that my happy dancing is unchained. Several people in the UK have contacted me, asking when the eBook version of my series would be available for download in the UK, and now I can answer—this autumn! I’m very grateful to Anne for giving the new guy in the US a chance.

Stay tuned for another announcement on Monday. :)

DENVER, baby! Yeah!

The signing and such wasn’t scheduled until later that night, so we had the day to mess around. Took the Kid to the Denver Zoo because they have awesome critters there and they’re the greenest zoo in the United States. They’re also more involved in species preservation than any other zoo I know of. They had a baby komodo dragon! Baby this, baby that…might have a baby snow leopard someday if they’re lucky, because they have a pair! Animal pics follow, click to enlarge:

After the zoo it was time to head over to the Broadway Book Mall. It’s the coolest wee store I’ve ever seen—Nina was so kind and welcoming and she knows what’s important. She has a shelf for ZOMBIE LITERATURE, my friends. This store rocks! She also had a signed copy of The Wise Man’s Fear, so I had to buy it. She has signed stuff from Carrie Vaughn, Connie Willis, and more; honestly, if you’re in Denver, you gotta go check this place out.

I met some great local authors n’ artists—shout out to Bonnie and Laura! And a couple of my dear yearbookin’ friends stopped by and made my day, because I haven’t seen them for a couple of years. When it comes to my nerdhood, I specialize in several fields. Yearbook nerds are called Yerds and we obsess over things like ligatures and Photoshop filters. It makes us happy. See how happy we are?

This was also my opportunity to meet a couple members of The League of Reluctant Adults for the first time, Mario Acevedo and Jeanne Stein! We promptly misbehaved. Or rather, Mario did. Here is the soon-to-be-famous Grope Attempt:

Jeanne was about to whip out her kung fu after that. Mario’s lucky she left her shank at home.

Mario promised to behave after that, but Jeanne still wanted to express herself in a dignified manner.

We went to The Great Divide Brewing Co. tap room after the signing, and here are the samplers of their beers:

They look good, and the one I’m excited about is the Chocolate Oak Aged Yeti, which you see on the far right. I tried it and it’s a heavy drink, hints of both chocolate and coffee to it, 9.5% alcohol content. It’s something to sip and enjoy, not chug. Unfortunately, I can’t say anything about the other beers because MARIO DRANK THEM ALL and I couldn’t order more, since these were ordered on Last Call! Yes, he stole my beer. Brazenly. In a Hawaiian shirt. Proof:

Oh well, at least I can report that the Yeti is good! I had a great time last night and now I’m writing this in Laramie, Wyoming, at the Hastings store here. It’s a cool town! I signed their stock and chatted with the nice people who work here. After another hour or so I’m headed back down to Ft. Collins for a signing at Old Firehouse Books.

I really dig Denver…wish I could explore some more. Methinks I might do this again next summer, it’s been so much fun! More later on Ft. Collins!

Meant to get this up on release day, but just couldn’t get to it—better late than never!

Many people have told me that the cover for HEXED is their favorite cover in the series, and I confess that it is mine also. Atticus is lookin’ right at us, pointing the pointy part o’ Fragarach in our general direction, and he looks as if he might be saying something along the lines of “Drop. Your. Sword.” to someone like Prince Humperdinck in The Princess Bride. If you’ve read the book already, you know when Fragarach comes out to play and you can imagine very well who’s getting the ol’ evil eye. But let’s pretend you haven’t read it yet and treat this like a caption contest. What’s Atticus doing here? Who’s he talking to? About what? Time to have fun!

DA RULEZ:
1.) This sucker’s international, unless you’re from Trinidad & Tobago. I’ve never gotten over my disappointment that the proper demonym for your country isn’t “Toboggans”. That totally crushed my spirit when I was learning about your country in sixth grade geography, and this is my petty revenge.
2.) Take a giant swig of your creative juices and snap a digital photo of HEXED in an amusing composition. Perhaps Atticus is pointing at something in the foreground…perhaps he’s protecting something in the background? Title it or write a caption for it—or both. You can use the paperback, a cover display on your electronic device, or even use the cover art digitally if you want to do the entire thing in Photoshop. See? No purchase necessary.
3.) Either post your composition somewhere and link to it in the comments below, or send me a jpeg as an attachment in an email sent to kevin at kevinhearne dot com. You have until Wednesday, June 15!
4.) By entering the contest you give me permission to post your picture here and on my author Facebook page in an album I’m creating for the purpose.
5.) I will pick two winners at random so you’ll have a chance at winning even if you ran dry of creative juices long ago. But I will pick five winners because they make me smile, chuckle, titter, or even guffaw. I haven’t had a good guffaw in a long time. Last time was back in ’98, I think.
6.) As a hint, I tend to enjoy wordplay and double meanings quite a bit. Be punny and you’re more likely to make me titter.

DA PRIZES:
1. One of five signed copies of HAMMERED, third book in the series.
2. One of two signed copies of HEXED, which you may already own, but think of all the Cool Points you’ll have if you own a signed copy too! ;)

SETTING THE BAR LOW:
I composed a simple one and snapped the photo with my cruddy cell phone camera, so it’s going to be pretty easy to beat. I’m posting it here as an example of the sort of thing we’re all going to enjoy:

All right, Atticus fans. Go have fun! Can’t wait to see what you guys come up with! Remember, I need it on or before June 15!