Tag Archives: the Man

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The Shadow Contest

I’ve been informed that one is not allowed to run contests on Facebook to give away things like signed author copies. It is, apparently, Against The Rules. I haven’t read said rules, nor do I intend to, because every time I read a rule a little piece of my soul flies away. I do think someone’s wit is diseased, however. You make a social thingamabob like Facebook and then tell people they can’t have contests on it? That’s like giving a child a toy and then telling them they can’t play with it. Super mean poopy heads!

It’s the sort of thing the Man would do, that’s what it is. So we are going to stick it to the Man. We are going to be ninjas and have a contest without Facebook ever knowing we had one. It will be a Shadow Contest. It’s easy. On Wednesday, May 25, I’m gonna randomly select three (3) NEATO PEOPLE WHO READ BOOKS from the giant list of folks that Facebook calls fans or friends or WHATEVER it says in their rules I never read. I will attempt to contact those people and ask them to send me their addresses. And then I’m going to mail them each a signed copy of HEXED, the second book in The Iron Druid Chronicles. They’ll win it before they can buy it (as long as they’re in the US or Canada)! And the Man will cry.

"Stick It to the Man" by Charlie Flannery

If you already have gotten all clicky on the button that says “like” on Facebook and you are therefore a NEATO PERSON WHO READS BOOKS, you are already entered. If you are not already a NEATO PERSON WHO READS BOOKS, allow me to give you some reasons why you should join the illustrious ranks:
1) You will stick it to the Man.
2) I put some content on my Facebook author page that I don’t share on my blog. The Iron Druid Wallpapers, a bunch of photos from my upcoming tour of Colorado, and the priceless picture of my editors in a Luchador mask are just a few of the goodies you’ll find there.
3) It’s kinda easy to talk to me there, since I actually check it. My blog is spiffy and I love it, but since the comments can become riddled with spam I have a security question thingie that involves math and I think that discourages people from commenting. (Reason #637 why spammers should be sterilized.) I’ve talked to more folks on Facebook in the past couple of days than I have in the past month on my blog.
4) You can win a signed copy of HEXED!
5) You have always wanted to be a part of something with “Shadow” in the name of it. Shadow Council, Shadow Contest, Shadow Fish Fry—they are all cool because of the Shadow. It’s axiomatic. And now’s your chance to be shadowy!

Seriously, thank you to all the people who are already following me on Facebook—I appreciate your support and the chance to connect with you. :) I wish you the best o’ luck in the Shadow Contest! Cheers!

Blog

I stuck it to The Man

Generally I’m a mild-mannered fella and not given to moments of rebellion; I’m closer to J. Alfred Prufrock than Randall Patrick McMurphy, if you know what I’m sayin’. But that doesn’t mean I don’t long to stick it to The Man when I have the chance. In this case, I have denied him my dollars.

Until recently, we had one of those bundle deals where you get high speed Internet(s), phone, and cable TV all on the same bill. The bill, I noticed, kept getting bigger. So a couple days ago I called the company and cancelled both my TV and my phone. I’m keepin’ the Internet so I can blog n’ stuff. :) Now my family will read more and get called less by people we don’t know. Already I am snuggly in my quiet bliss. My daughter is reading a book RIGHT NOW instead of having her brain liquefied by the Disney channel. And The Man will be denied about a thousand dollars of my money this year. Purrrrrrr.

BUT THEN, in a CRUEL TWIST o’ FATE, The Man got me back. “Ha!” he sneered. “You like to read, do ya? Then I’m going to force Borders into bankruptcy and they’ll CLOSE A BUNCH OF STORES! Try to read now, you elitist fancy pants!”

In sooth I am sad. I know Borders was a hot mess (and may remain so), but damn I loved going into their stores. They smelled good. Paper and glue and ink and coffee from the cafe…heaven. Even if it was a disorganized heaven where I had a minor snit one time because I couldn’t find one of Kelly Meding’s books, it’s still about the only kind of store I like visiting.

The very idea of fewer bookstores drives me to melancholia. There are lots of things we could do without instead. How about fewer gun shops, or fewer payday loan centers?

I raise my cuppa hot chocolate with marshmallows n’ schnapps in a toast: To bookstores! And to sticking it to The Man.

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In Praise of Strange Traditions

I have much to be thankful for: my wife and child, a house to keep them safe, and entertaining brouhahas between my dogs and cats; a spiffy set of friends; and a good publishing deal that represents a dream come true for me.

But on the day itself, I think I’m most thankful for the strange traditions of my family. I have no idea how they started, but part of me doesn’t really want to know. I’d rather enjoy the mystery and oddity of it all.

Here’s what we do: we go out to the McDowell Mountain Preserve north of Fountain Hills and have our full turkey dinner out there, on stone picnic tables, amongst the Saguaros and the Palo Verdes and the teddy bear cholla. Now this dinner is all-out, mind you, there’s nothing missing: we have the gravy, we have the sweet potato thing with the marshmallows on it, and several homemade pies are on hand for dessert. It just has this potluck feel to it since everybody brings something and it’s not all cooked in one kitchen, plus there’s the whole paper plate thing.

After the dinner we all hike up Lone Mountain to burn maybe 300 of the 5,000 calories we consume, and then comes the topper: we string a rope over a Palo Verde branch and beat the crap out of a pinata. This is simply inexplicable to me and I love it. I remember doing it when I was a kid, and now I watch my daughter do it and I’m telling you, it’s a really good time.

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday simply because my family has managed to stray far, far away from the Hollywood-packaged motif of sitting around grandfather’s table and squabbling about this and that. We have a freakin’ picnic among plants that want to stab us and nobody does the dishes! We’re Bohemians! We’re fightin’ the Power! Stickin’ it to the Man! We’re On the Bus!

I hope y’all are happy and safe and thankful for this fortunate life we’re living.